Sunday, December 28, 2008

Sunday Night Jam

a homage to the greatest girls in the world: Jersey Girls

Tom Waits, a California native and a badass singer and songwriter, once met a girl and instantly fell in love with her and her cool ways. He fell for her so hard that he wrote a song about her and then married her. He then made babies with her. She was from Jersey. The Song was titled "Jersey Girl." They are still married.

I have lived in a few states, visited even more, and try to kiss girls from all. California girls are cool, Southern girls are sweet, MidWest girls are freaks, but let me tell you, nothing is better than a girl from Jersey. They're pretty and cool, badass and safe to bring home to ma. They will treat you like a King if you treat them like a Queen. They are sexy as hell and sweeter than Snapple ice-tea. They understand that bagels are for the mornings and pancakes are for after midnight. And despite the music they prefer they know all the words to "Livin' On A Prayer;" they know that Bruce is The Boss, Sinatra was from Hoboken, and they all have a favourite Naughty By Nature song.

In honour of them we present you with the greatest love song ever made, Tom Waits' "Jersey Girl" performed by The Boss in Asbury Park with an added final verse:

Wednesday, December 24, 2008

Getting a Job in the Depression - A True Story

Our loyal reader recently inquired why I haven't posted any posts in a long stretch of days now. I informed him I am knee-deep filtering my offers in the robust job market and it occupies my post-graduate schedule. My strategy is fairly straightforward - allow me to enlighten you.

Each week at 8:00 am PST on Monday, I send out my resume to approximately 50 companies I am over-qualified to work for. I once sent a resume to Subway that only said my name, Eat Fresh and the name of my accredited institution of higher learning. I then wait by my phone for the offers to roll in. I systematically reject all of them after leading them on for a few minutes to build my self-confidence. I then re-write each point on my resume by including the phrase "highly sought" in front of all descripting adjectives. Then, at about 1 pm PST, I go to Monster.com to look at entry-level positions. Invariably, no matter what I put in the search field, half of all of the opportunities are from the US Navy. I can type in actor and: Media Opportunities, US Navy comes up. Granted, if I was in the Navy, I would probably be doing quite a bit of acting, especially pretending to be in agreement with most of my superiors ideologies, however, I highly doubt the Navy is the ideal place to get noticed by anyone who isn't trying to kill you.

Once I pass on all the Navy opportunities, I go to Careerbuilder. I send out my resume to compete with execs who have been recently bought out and I have seen fairly mixed results, in that, sometimes I get a response saying they are not interested and sometimes I don't get a response at all. I sent out my resume to the Yankees last week because I heard they were giving money away, but I only came away with a 3-year deal. Sorry George, I'm looking for bigger fish. Anyway, the one thing I have going for me at these sites is my salary history, which is an employers hiring strategy to squeeze their servants as much as possible. My history includes my latest jury duty stint that paid $15 a day plus travel expenses, and it has employers drooling.

Alas, there is, in my estimation, one great place to find work: Craigslist. Maybe it's just me, but I like my job site to double as a place to get free furniture and see who's turning tricks in the local community. Sometimes I get distracted on Craigslist by the lack of real jobs and start wandering to other Craigslist sites (did you know there is a Craigslist called the Western Slope in Colorado?) Is this some kind of sick joke? I thought it was too - until I found a job that pays double digits everyday to wave at people, http://westslope.craigslist.org/csr/964999054.html.

Now I've got time to blog again. I'm back in the game, George.

Tuesday, December 23, 2008

Damn Yankees


I'm a die hard Yankee fan thru and thru, just ask the three red sox fans that I have left battered and bloodied over the past few years, but dammit I think they have gone too far.

for the month of December they have signed:

C.C. Sabathia - $161mil/7 years
A.J. Burnett - $82.5mil/5 years
and now
Mark Teixeira - $180mil/8 years

I'm not a genius but I believe that is $423.5 million spent in one month. Yes they have a new stadium that is opening this season, and yes they need to attract fans to fill those expensive seats, but dude!

George Steinbrenner officially created a monster that we now know will live on long after he dies.
Tonight I will drink to you my Yanks, but if you guys don't win this year or next I'm not sure I will be able to defend you for much longer.

Monday, December 22, 2008

Uncle Buck


If we were to divide talent by weight John Candy still would've been a better investment than Dakota Fanning. The guy made me laugh whether it was in The Great Outdoors, Cool Runnings, Spaceballs, Home Alone, Uncle Buck, or Who's Harry Crumb. The dude was a legend and is too often forgotten. It's not his birthday nor the anniversary of his death, no we want to honour him because he deserves it. So enjoy the little clip below from his last movie, the Michael Moore directed Canadian Bacon:

Sunday, December 21, 2008

Sunday Night Jam

I've been told that youtube is being a lil bitch and taking down most of the music videos and other good stuff like college girls who like to dance and sometimes get hot while dancing so they take some clothes off videos. whatever.

Gods and Monsters with Jeff Buckley - She is Free

Thursday, December 18, 2008

Afternoon Pick Me Up Courtesy of Kiki

For those feeling like they need a second wind to get them through the day/night, below listen to one of my favorite songs right now from one of my favorite bands, The Black Keys, titled "I Got Mine." It's a brilliant and badass song, with a bassline and sound that should give you a much needed energy boost and some head bobbing.

Tuesday, December 16, 2008

random musings vol. III

I'm baaaaaaaaaaaaaack. Miss me? Below for your eyeball pleasure, another installment of random musings vol III.

- My top 3 hip hop songs right now, in order are: 1)"Brooklyn Go Hard" by Jay-Z (bananas) 2) "Something Foul" by Nas (old school type ish) 3) the original version of "Be" on the album of the same name (almost makes me forgive him for his new album...turrible)

- The Simpsons is genius. I watched it tonight for the first time in a minute and it is hilarious. Seth McFarlane should be sending Matt Groening royalty checks.

- Whitney Port is foine. Kiki yikey.

- OJ, OJ, OJ....Man, what has your life come to if you are trying to steal back your own memorabilia and pictures of your kids from some strangers in a hotel room in Vegas? And then go to jail for it. You got a lucky break with the verdict of that one trial whose name we won't mention, and you went ahead and effed it all up. SMH. (shout out to Bossip)

- But I tell you what, if OJ's ass is going to jail for 15 years for armed robbery, Bernie Madoff, that dude who ran a $50 BILLION ponzi scheme, should be going to jail forever. When it rains it pours. Gotta love the financial industry right now.

- Kanye's performances on SNL were turrible. If you can't hold a note, turn on that autotune son. damn.

- The new Amex commercials are dope. Remind me to look up what ad agency they use.

Monday, December 15, 2008

baruch atah, i'm annoyed

my computer got mopped up again by the same flesh eating computer virus that has cropped up 8 times in as many years, thereby effing up my growing but admittedly random music collection. as such, i've taken this opportunity to tighten up, trim the fat, and with the help of the torrent community, build a library that i can then upload onto my ipod, which i can then present to my son on his thirteenth birthday.

jog to this: the fleet foxes put out an album on sub-pop records and it sounds like paul simon chamber music. it reminds me of the childhood i never had harvesting rice from the banau rice terraces in a rural mountain region of the philippines.


drive to this:in the aeroplane over the sea, was the second album from neutral milk hotel. it's a a collection of disarmingly beautiful and scatalogical musings on the procession of life. i once walked into some hipster boutique and immediately thought that the staff must be pretty chill when they put this on over the speakers.


smoke lots sess to this:company flow's debut album funcrusher plus. this album has a bootsrapping diy steez with sparse beats and derisive, witty, sardonic lyrics like "triple felon emcee minus the melanin, when i bomb it the type of shit to make baby jessica jump in the well again." yikes.

Hooked on Phonics and Basketball


I'm a New York Knicks fan. Yes yes I know, they suck now, but growing up in North Jersey I had to choose between the Knicks and the Nets and Derrick Coleman + Kenny Anderson just didn't do it for me. No, I was a Ewing, Oakley, Mason, and Starks type of kid. Shoot, I even liked them when Grandmama was a Knick and when Allan Houston had heart. These were my guys and we went through it all: the Rockets,the Finals, the Heat, Riley to Van Gundy, the fight, the four point play, Reggie "The Devil" Miller. I even still have the video recordings of some of the greatest games they ever played.

Above all, the player that stood out to me the most was Ewing. The dude was a beast and most importantly, he cared about winning. You could not doubt his desire to win and his love for New York. The way that Starks would hug him after one of them would make a big play made us all want to hug a tall person or get hugged by a small one. I never wanted to be Ewing, but dammit I loved that guy and I still do. It was a sad day when his time was up with the Knicks.


But two little facts came together for me the other day that have me a little worried: Ewing went to and graduated from Georgetown, one of the most respected educational institutions in America; yet after he retired from basketball he announced that he had never learned how to read. There are only two possible scenarios for this paradox, he cheated or Georgetown isn't all that it's cracked up to be. We might never get a real answer to this problem, but if my future kids want to go to Georgetown, it would be in their best interest for me to steer them away.

Sunday, December 14, 2008

Sunday Night Jam

Cold War Kids - Robbers



(expect more posting from us. soon.)

Sunday, December 7, 2008

Time To Get Married


When winter rolls around, daylight fades a lil earlier, people get cold, and baby making season peaks. There is nothing really wrong with this. it has been going on since before you or I were born. Of concern, however, is an ill advised side affect: marriage proposals.

Let me clarify my stance on marriage; I believe marriage is a good thing, a thing that we should all experience once if we can. What makes it easier is that there are plenty of people out there of whom we are compatible with, but too many of us pick the wrong person because winter makes us believe that the person that is warming us up when it was cold outside is Mr./Ms. Right. In other words, winter can be the devil in disguise.

When broken down, compatibility really means willingness to compromise. When you find someone that you are attracted to, you are intrigued to find out more. As you learn new things you begin to decide what you're cool with, what you're not, and what you're willing to forget about until you get in a fight. If you happen to be one of the lucky ones with a good personality and good looks, there is no need to worry about compatibility, the other person will do all the compromising.

The issue is that people compromise too much during the winter when sometimes a stuffed animal is all you need. I don't have hard figures, but I'm guessing that 1/3 of the marriage proposals that will be made from now till April will be broken by June because that's when the mental party starts. Of those that do end up getting married, half of them won't make it past 10 years.

Now I'm not saying that settling is bad, we all settle at some point because there is no perfect person out there. What I am saying is, don't let the cold air eff up your judgment. Wait a lil bit, things will warm up.

Sunday Night Jam

The Rolling Stones - Under My Thumb
the woman's movement hated this song but there really wasn't anything wrong with it.

Thursday, December 4, 2008

Happy Birthday Joe Camel

I keeeed, I jokes with you. A very happy birthday to Mr. Shawn "I Ball For Real, Ya'll Ni**as is" Carter on his 39th birthday. Dude is the definition of a hustler and icon (sorry Dame). And most importantly, he is Kiki's favorite rapper of all time.

Peep below for the official video of Jay-Z's dope new track titled "Brooklyn Go Hard" off the Notorious soundtrack. The 1st verse is absolute murder. Now seriously, lose the glasses. Please.

Jay-Z on iLike - Get updates inside iTunes

Monday, December 1, 2008

a word on steak and eggs


i am a carnivore as is my father and his father before him. i also like to drink. so while a shortstack of pancakes imbibed in maple syrup might sound good to somebody after one too many jack and cokes, you can count on me to holler at some steak and eggs.

now normally i like the no frills variety- any meat will do, eggs in any style so long as the yolk is runny, and some homefries and even some toast if i'm feeling randy. but there is much to be said for something with a little more moxie. and that's where longsilog comes in.

technically, longsilog is sausage and eggs, but honestly, who's keeping track? throw me some cholesterol and i'm straight. it's a dish that was a mainstay in my house growing up, and is essentially comprised of rice lightly fried in garlic and sometimes ginger, (preferably) two eggs in any style, and longoniza, a chorizo style sausage that tastes best with a little bit of vinegar.

because this post is more about eating than it is about cooking, i'm not gonna outline the recipe right here. i suppose that's kind of wack but i'm pressed for time because i'm sitting in front of a hot plate of it right now. good luck getting your own. peace in the middle east.